What's Love Got To Do With It?
by Smile Life Away
Summary: "It's funny how four simple words tied to his name shatter his heart into a million pieces." A Sirius/Lily story - for Morghen


**A/N: for Morghen, it took me ten tries and a Tina Turner song but I finally got it. :)**

**Disclaimer: I Own Nothing**

**Thanks to wvvampire for betaing this for me :)**

**Song: "**_**What's Love Got To Do With It" by **_**Tina Turner **

* * *

_You must understand  
Though the touch of your hand  
Makes my pulse react  
That it's only the thrill  
Of boy meeting girl  
Opposites attract_

The first time he talks to her – not taunts, talks – she's sitting in the deserted Gryffindor Common Room with her knees folded into her chest, sobbing. Sirius isn't known for his sensitivity and he really could care less about Lily Evans, but this is the third time this week she's missed dinner and it's partially his fault, mostly James's, but partially his. So he throws on a winning smile and sits beside her on the couch.

"Are you all right, Evans?"

He's not expecting her reaction. She looks up at him – with tear-stained cheeks and violent green eyes – and slaps him, straight across the face. Sirius Black is no masochist, but that's the day he falls in love with Lily Evans.

_It's physical  
Only logical  
You must try to ignore  
That it means more than that  
_

He kisses her under the mistletoe in sixth year when he's stone drunk on fire-whiskey. She kisses him back. Maybe because she's drunk too, maybe because like every other girl she wants to say _I kissed Sirius Black_. The reason doesn't matter to him though, because she tastes good and she feels good and he's wanted to kiss Lily Evans since the day she slapped him in fifth year –because she's the only girl he's ever wanted that's never fallen under his spell. Or maybe it's just because he's drunk. He'd rather blame it on the alcohol.

_Oh what's love got to do, got to do with it  
What's love but a second hand emotion  
What's love got to do, got to do with it  
Who needs a heart  
When a heart can be broken  
_

When he wakes up the next morning he remembers everything, she doesn't though. So when he walks up to her and plants a kiss on her lips he expects her to slap him. She doesn't though; she instinctually kisses him back and then slaps him.

"Stay away from me, Black." She growls.

It's funny how four simple words tied to his name shatter his heart into a million pieces. He doesn't let it show though, he gives a coy smile and leans in to kiss her again. This time she hexes him. He tells James some insane fib about why his skin is green.

_It may seem to you  
That I'm acting confused  
When you're close to me  
If I tend to look dazed  
I've read it someplace  
I've got cause to be_

Slughorn makes her tutor him in potions, because Snape outright refuses – not that Sirius wants _his _help anyway – and Remus just isn't a potions master. So the job falls to Lily. He doesn't learn anything because he spends the entire time staring at her and getting lost in her green eyes.

Every now and again she'll look up at him and ask:

"Are you even paying attention?"

And he'll snap out of his reverie and nod until she goes back to explaining. Then he focuses back on her bright green eyes with his stormy gray ones.

_There's a name for it  
There's a phrase that fits  
But whatever the reason  
You do it for me_

Eventually he realizes she'll never understand it. He's not sure when it happens, probably when she starts getting boyfriends. He doesn't let it affect him because he was never her boyfriend anyway. He just pines after her, adores her, lov- no, he's learned not to use that word anymore. She'll never be his he gets that. Sirius Black understands that he can't have everything. But he can't help it that his heart hammers when she smiles in his direction, even if it's directed towards the person behind him.

_I've been taking on a new direction  
But I have to say  
I've been thinking about my own protection  
It scares me to feel this way_

He moves on too, he plays games with Alice until he realizes she's too clever for him. It's a consensual break-up, no one's hurt and besides she's always liked Frank more. He tries out Mary, but she's too clingy so he breaks her heart. And so he goes after Lily again. But something's changed; it's a one-word change, enough to stop him in his tracks.

"James."

So he walks away, and leaves Lily in the dust.

_What's love got to do, got to do with it  
What's love but a sweet old fashioned notion  
What's love got to do, got to do with it  
Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken_

On the very last day of seventh year, when he's finally managed to mend his heart, she comes up to him with James at her side and places a dry kiss on his cheek.

"Goodbye, Sirius Black." She murmurs.

And he finds himself once again thinking that he loves her, even though he knows better than to use _love _and _Lily Evans _in the same sentence. But the thought is there and the threads that are holding his heart together snap and the break is re-formed.

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**A/N:** **Please Review :)**


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